In our first three nemesis examples the people were those who are very close to us, our family. Now we’re going to be shifting gears a bit and looking at the people who we spend a huge amount of time around (not by choice), and often times we might not even necessarily like them…
Our work colleagues.
In an ideal situation you will love your job, enjoy your colleagues company, and like your boss. What I’ve found from speaking to loads of clients though is that’s not usually the case, in fact work can be one of the biggest causes of stress.
Now, you’ve got to think we spend 1/3 of our lives sleeping and another 1/3 of our lives at work with people who we likely wouldn’t normally choose to be around. If your work colleagues rub you the wrong way that essentially means you’re spending 1/3 of your life not enjoying yourself, which leaves you with less than 1/3 of your life to do all of the other things in life (and part of that time you might even spend stressing about the 1/3 you spend at work!).
If you can relate to this, it’s time to take a stand and stop letting people at work grind you down. If it’s your colleagues that are the problem, speak with your boss to see if you can move desk, join another department, or maybe even apply for a new job, position, or promotion. Another option is to try adopting a flexible working schedule if that’s possible for you, where you might only have to be in the office a couple days a week, so you don’t have to be around these people so much.
If it’s your boss that’s the issue, maybe you need to approach them and explain how they’re making you feel. If that doesn’t work out, then it might be necessary to go above them and explain how they’re making you feel and how it’s affecting your work. Aim to present it in a non-confrontational way that will instigate positive change. Reflect on how you might change your situation to reduce the negative energy you have around.
I’m fortunate that I don’t have a boss and haven’t had one in 20 years. I’m grateful for the colleagues I do have and the team around me, I couldn’t ask for better people. Unfortunately, not everyone can say the same, so it’s important to try and cultivate a situation where you feel happy and confident, rather than stressed and anxious about work. Since we spend such a massive portion of our lives working, we’re not going to optimise the life that we truly want in that 1/3 that we have leftover (after sleeping and working) if we’re constantly surrounded by negative energy.
So look at your current work situation and see what changes you can implement to get to a better place. I encourage you to make this shift ASAP!